Ultimate Reset, Reflections on Day 2

Day 2 went really well!  I haven't cheated one bit, and I have been 100% committed to the process. Last night was tricky because I made the kids French toast for dinner.  R didn't finish much of hers, and when I went to clear her plate, the powdered sugar was calling to me.  Yet, I didn't cave.  I said to myself, "Don't eat that. It will not get you to your goals."  I succeeded!!  I feel such a sense of accomplishment: it's snacking on the kids' stuff is what got me where I am.  Not eating their food needs to become a long term habit.

I am not someone who does something halfway, and this applies to eating.  I wanted to learn to run long distances, so I trained and rain a marathon (3 actually).  I wanted to learn more about French and language acquisition, so I got a Ph.D. in it.  I enjoyed working with Beachbody products so much, so I became a coach.  "Halfway" is not in my personal dictionary.  For all of the above things, going full tilt is GREAT.  When it comes to eating poorly, this can be a very bad thing.  When I'm in my funks, I tend to say to myself about the kids' food, "Oh this one bite won't hurt."  Trouble is, that single bite leads to a full meal of snacking.  I go from their food, to the cabinets, to the fridge, and repeat the cycle.

After completing this Reset the first time, I developed post-Reset rules for myself, namely "No drinking alcohol at home." And, I almost NEVER drink alcohol at home anymore.  I work well with rules, which is why the Reset works so well for me.  Tell me to do something, or not to do it, and I'll do it (or not do it).  So, I believe that my next rule needs to be, "Do not eat the kids leftovers."  If I do, it opens up a Pandora's box of crud.  I can ruin an entire day of being attentive to my nutrition in just a few bites.  So, it appears that this rule needs to be added to my list.  I have every reason to believe that I will stick to it, because that's how I roll.  ;-)

I love that I am learning so much about myself and my behaviors & habits this time through.  I love that I am reflecting on not just WHAT I am eating but WHY I am eating it.  It is time to kick these habits to the curb!

Onward and upward to Day 3!

Ultimate Reset, Reflections on Day 1

I triumphed over Day 1.  It was a great day.  I had to remind myself several times not to eat animal crackers or the kids' leftovers.  I did it, though.  I managed to begin the transformation process: redefining my relationship with food, recommitting to clean eating, reconnecting to the joy in life.

I realized this morning, the beginning of Day 2, that I already feel so much better.  For the past few months, I have not been feeling right. I've been on edge and certainly not enjoying my days, and I haven't been sleeping well at all. This morning I woke up feeling ready to tackle the day.  The kids woke up REALLY early and instead of being annoyed at their incessant bickering and clamoring for my attention, I smiled and thought, "Wow. I am so grateful."  I remember mornings years ago when it was just Shannon and me.  All we wanted was to add to our family.  When it was clear that it wasn't going to happen the way we thought, I felt so sad, so lonely, and just longed for the busy mornings that I remember from my childhood at my house.

These are the memories I find again.  When I am not busy obsessing over my food, my weight, or my unfortunate food choices these past few months, the happy memories come flooding back to me.  I focus on the positive. Instead of being upset that my kids woke up too early, I see them for the beauty that they are--these amazing little creatures who came in to our lives and truly made our lives whole. If this is what 21 days of clean eating and detoxing will give me, I will gladly take it, and I will DEFINITELY continue the process.

Part of the reason I am keeping this blog is to remember the process, to remember the feelings of triumph, of doing the right and healthy thing for my family and for me.  I want to enjoy these days with my kids and my husband, and it appears that the way to do that is through nutrition.  Who woulda thunk it?

Ultimate Reset, Day 1: The scale

Today is Day 1 of the Ultimate Reset for me.  I am REALLY excited to get going on this amazing 21 day clean eating & detox program.  I have done it a number of times in the past year, and I love the results.

Part of the program is to weigh yourself, take your measurements, and before pictures on Day 1.  I weighed myself this morning, and OMG! I'm REALLY annoyed at myself.  Since I did the program last (July 2014), I've gained 10 pounds.  There, I said it.  It always amazes me how LONG it takes to lose weight and how quickly it goes back on.  Holy cow.

Even before I weighed myself, I knew that I had gained weight.  All of my clothes are tight.  After doing the program the first time in April 2013, I lost 14 pounds and 9.5 inches.  In an effort to tell and show myself that I would NEVER gain that weight back, I donated all of my "fat" clothes.  Now, I REFUSE to buy new ones at a larger size, because I KNOW that I can take it off and get back to a healthy place.

Where I find myself now is SO FRUSTRATING.  To move forward, though, I will have to let go of the frustration. I will have to start clean (no pun intended) TODAY, acknowledge that I've gained weight, think about how it happened, and then vow to take every day as it comes. I find myself already panicked about Day 22, the day after the program comes to an end.  Should I continue to follow the program beyond the 21 days? Probably not.  The experts at BB suggest 21 days for a reason, and I should listen to them.  Should I slowly enter back in to the "real" world of eating? That seems like a better solution.  Should I get back to the 21 Day Fix and its workouts? Yes!  Definitely.

This time around, my focus is going to be on the mind-body-nutrition connection.  This seems like it's the last piece of the puzzle for me.  I am SUPER successful on this program.  Then, I get back to my old ways, and I don't know why.  I feel SO GREAT on this plan.  I have tons of energy; I am happy that I am focusing on my health and wellness, and I find myself REALLY happy.  Always REALLY happy.

And, who doesn't like going in to their closet without wondering what will fit?!  Time for that to stop. Please continue reading and feel free to make a comment.

Breakfast, Day 1: 2 scrambled eggs, 1 1/2 cups steamed spinach, and whole wheat toast.  See? I'm NOT kidding: good food, WHOLE food.  I CAN do this.

Day 17: It's been a week???

I can't believe it's been a week since my last post.  WOW! Time flies.

This past week has been filled with a lot of ups and downs.  The ups have come in the form of less bloating, reconnections with my favorite Ultimate Reset foods (sweet potato, anyone?), clothes that are no longer tight, and a generally brighter attitude about where I am on my health and wellness journey. The downs have come in the form of caving to some sweets (s'mores, anyone?), snacking once or twice off of the kids plates, and an occasional bad attitude about the aforementioned infractions.  I let go of the s'more infraction right away.  It was good and yummy and gooey.  Three of my favorite adjectives. However, that small taste of s'more seemed to have opened the floodgates to a few more infractions.  In my normal life, these would not be infractions. I don't eat or live that way.  I track my food, do my workouts, drink tons of water, and I indulge on a regular basis for life is meant to be enjoyed. However, these 21 days are VERY strict and are about reconnecting with old habits or beginning new habits.  So, for these 21 days, there really is no wiggle room.   I wiggled.  A lot.  What to do, what to do?

My options were:
1)  I could bag the whole thing and quit.  For those of you who know me, you know that "quit" is not in my vocabulary, so this option was clearly not actually an option.
2) I could just get back on the program and not beat myself up.
3) I could just get back on the program AFTER beating myself up.
4) I could whine and moan about how this program is so hard.

There are other options, I'm sure, but these were the first ones to come to me.  I am happy to say that I chose #2 with about 3 minutes option #3 mixed in (the beating up passed very quickly).  Once the moments were done, I moved on.

My results may not end up being as wonderful as I had wanted them to be, but that is ok.  The point is that I have reconnected with my healthy habits and foods, and I am feeling really good.  So far, during week 3, all is well.  I have just 4 more days to go.  I am looking forward to them.

Onward and upward.

Day 10: Living the dream

As I sat yesterday with my hunger pangs, I began to think about all of the people in the world who have NOTHING to eat or drink.  The other day I watched the kids at the local pool play with the water and the shower near the sandbox.  They take the endless water for granted.  They press the button, the water comes out, and they walk away while the water is still running. I don't think that they realize that water is a precious commodity around the world, something that is in short supply in many areas of the world.  More often than not if there is water, it is contaminated.

It's the same with food.  We are blessed to have an abundant supply.  While watching the kids at the pool I noticed that they (seemed) to take it for granted: go to the snack counter, ask for something, put down your money, and voilà, there's your food.  Let me say: There is NOTHING wrong with this way of being.  I do not expect 10 year olds to wonder about the rest of the world as they go to buy an ice cream cone.  It would be great if they did, but I would never expect that from a kid.  My only point is that these observations gave way to thoughts about my own relationship with food.

As I worked through my pangs of hunger, I realized that the pangs would disappear as soon as I had my snack of blueberries and an apple.  If kids around the world can live for days without food (they can, but that's not to say that they SHOULD), I can go a few hours without snacking.  Yesterday's afternoon reflections gave me great pause and an amazing sense of, "Hey, this is NO BIG DEAL."  I sit here now, and I am grateful for the food in my cupboards and my refrigerator and, though the hunger pangs have begun again, I'm fine.  I am not worried, and I am definitely not stressed about where my snack will come from.  Today, my perspective has changed.  I am not hungry.  I am blessed.

Onward and upward!

Day 8: 1/3 done

Doing the Reset this time around has been really challenging.  I have been feeling VERY hungry which is unusual with this program.  I have not been snacking and have been following the program almost to a T (I confess that I had a nibble of a chocolate chip cookie yesterday).  Normally when I do this program, by day 8 (today), I am completely fine, in to the program, and not fighting to stay away from the pantry.  Days 1-today have been rough.  Not snacking, not nibbling the kids' food (which is my BIGGEST food challenge)... it's all been very tough to battle.  Part of the reason for the battle, I think, is that I am home for the summer.  I usually do the UR during the school year when I am busy and running from pillar to post.  Now that it's summer, I am home ALL THE TIME.  Sometimes I feel like the pantry is calling my name.  And, frankly, other than a bag of chocolate chips for baking (sure, that's what I tell myself), there is really nothing unhealthy in there.  The problem is none of it is on the 21 day program.

For this second week, I will focus on keeping all of us busy, staying outside when possible, doing more yoga and more walking, and reminding myself why I'm doing this.  I will also focus on what I DID accomplish during week 1:

1) Going to a MLB tailgate and NOT drinking anything but water & eating my pre-prepped salad and fruit;
2) Not quitting all together;
3) Drawing strength from the last time I did the UR in February when our dog died very suddenly. I keep telling myself if I can do it during that time of my life, I can keeping doing it now.
4) Keeping this blog to stay accountable;
5) Following the program as it is written;
6) Not complaining about it.  When people say, "Oh this must be SO HARD!" I reply, "No, it's all good. It's only 21 days, and I have BIG goals."  I am staying positive.

#40 is 14 days away!  Holy crap.  Where did the first 40 go? The idea of this birthday brings tears to my eyes, not because I am going to be 40, but because I seriously cannot believe this much time has passed in my life.  I look back and feel like my 13th birthday was just the other day.  Crazy.  Scary.

Onward and upward!

Day 3 is the hardest, so they say...

I am on Day 3 of the Ultimate Reset (UR).  This clean eating and detox journey is ALWAYS extremely productive for me.  Though I have to take a break from intense exercise, I find ways to move, get outside, and feel like I am really cleaning out my body.  The past two days have been very challenging as I get in to the habit of not eating between meals, not eating the kids' leftovers, not eating their snacks, and avoiding decaf coffee.  You may be asking, "what is this reset thing and how does it work?"  It's pretty simple.

The general rules:
1) Sleep as much as you can
2) Avoid alcohol and caffeine
3) Drink AT LEAST half your body weight in ounces of water
4) Strictly follow the program guidelines
5) Moderate exercise like walking and yoga are allowed; intense exercise like P90X3, T25, and TurboFire are not allowed (it's too much work for the body to eliminate toxins AND try to help muscles break down and then recover).
6) Caffeine free herbal tea is allowed.  I actually drink a lot of that IN ADDITION TO my required amount of water.

How do the 3 weeks break down?

Week 1: No alcohol or caffeine but TONS of water.  Fruits, veggies, grains (legumes), dairy, and other animal proteins are allowed (chicken and salmon to name just two). + the supplements.

Week 2: No alcohol or caffeine but TONS of water.  Animal proteins and dairy are removed.  Fruits, veggies, and grains remain + the supplements.

Week 3: No alcohol or caffeine but TONS of water.  Animal proteins, dairy, and grains are removed. Fruits and veggies remain + the supplements.

If you're like me and you LOVE your Shakeology, you are allowed ONLY vegan kinds.  Right now, I am out of my vegan chocolate, so I am totally off of Shakeology (sniff, sniff).

Below is an example of one of my lunches for week 1.  Grilled chicken, broccoli, peppers, & cauliflower.  See!?? Eating clean DOES NOT mean STARVING yourself.  This detox/reset is truly about resetting your body in a natural way.  I'm already feeling SO MUCH BETTER: less bloated, less fatigued, and in a way better mood because I know that I am eating well and healthfully.

If 21 days is too much for you, let me know. I have other, shorter solutions for you.  Comment below or message me on FB.

Onward and upward.